Pregnancy and infant loss totally fucking sucks. Yes, harsh language, but I feel like there is no other way to put it. Whether you carried to 6 weeks or 36 weeks or lost your beautiful babe in those first few days, losing a child is like no other kind of grief and trauma. And when you’re in the throes of grief, it may seem impossible to know how to nourish your body after pregnancy loss. But repeat after me: you are still worthy of postpartum care after pregnancy. 

Whether you count yourself among the 1 in 4 women who experience early pregnancy loss or the 1 in 160 who experience stillbirth, it’s important to acknowledge that your body and mind are deserving and worthy of nourishment. I’ve experienced both full-term stillbirth and the loss of a “chemical” pregnancy.  I grieved both of these losses very differently, but they were both impactful. While it may feel impossible to focus on healing in the early days of loss, acknowledge that your mind and body have undergone substantial changes through the course of pregnancy, even if you experienced loss “before the bump.”

Pregnancy loss takes a huge toll,
both physically and emotionally.

Whether you experienced a first trimester miscarriage or a full term stillbirth, you underwent substantial physiological changes, which means you need intentional nourishment, especially after loss.

Just some of the changes that occurred (that you may have not seen)

• Shift in hormones which impact pelvic floor functionality, ligament laxity, and make you more susceptible to urinary incontinence and low-back pain.
• Wider rib cage, elevated diaphragm, and a weakened, lengthened abdominal wall which puts more stress on your pelvis and spine.
• By the 3rd trimester of pregnancy, 100% of women will have some degree of diastasis recti (1)
• If you experienced stillbirth, your milk may have come in after birth. The hormone prolactin, that encourages milk production, also has a similar effect as relaxin on your ligaments, encouraging extra laxity. This increased laxity leads to an increased chance for injury and instability. 

All this physiological change is on top of the emotional trauma that is losing your baby. It is completely unfair and utter bullshit. 

After loss, nourishing your body now may feel like the last thing you want to do, but you deserve and need so much care. Intentionally nourish your body after pregnancy loss to encourage physical healing and ease the overwhelming tidal wave of grief. 

3 ways to nourish your body after pregnancy loss

Restorative movement

The timeframe to return to exercise will differ for everyone, but my favorite rule of thumb is your intentional recovery time should match the length of your pregnancy. So if you miscarried at 6 weeks, spend 6 weeks focusing on recovery. If you lost your pregnancy at full term, spend nine months on recovery. 

Now the physiological impact between 6 weeks and 9 months are substantially different. 

So what does intentional recovery look like?

• Restorative (First 20% of recovery) : Connecting with breath, establishing proper alignment, walking, mobility, and taking it real easy.
• Rehabilitative (Next 50% of recovery): Progressively building pelvic floor & core strength. Strength training in functional movemeents patterns with optimal breathing. 
• Rebuilding (Final 40% of recovery): Maintaining strong core and pelvic floor, increase aerobic capacity, progress strength training. 

If you experience any pain or pelvic floor dysfunction as you progress, take it back a few steps. 

Try these restorative movement poses 

• Connection breath
• Child’s pose
• Down Dog or Extended Puppy Dog Pose
• Lizard lunge
• Side kneeling plank
• Dead bugs
• Figure four
• Iron cross
• Savasana

 

Eat Nourishing Foods

Eating well is one of the best ways to nourish your body after pregnancy loss and support your mood, energy and healing. You may not have much of an appetite, but focus on incorporating plenty of iron-rich meats, warming soups, antioxidant rich veggies, and collagen rich proteins when you can. Collagen and iron are crucial to postpartum recovery after loss when your body and mind is in an intense state of grieving and processing, while rebuilding. Bright colored veggies and dark berries contain Vitamin C, which  is necessary for proper collagen synthesis and healing connective tissue. The antioxidant component to vitamin C limits the effects of free radicals, which increase with the inflammatory response to wound healing. 

These foods help heal and rebuild your body, reduce inflammation, and may reduce feelings of anxiety as you get essential nutrients. 

My favorite recipes for well-being include:

Beef Vegetable Soup

Roasted Red Pepper & Fennel Soup

Honey Mustard Baked Chicken Thighs 

Ask a family member or friend to whip these up for you, so you can focus on rest.

 

Rest

Sleep makes time for healing, both emotionally and physically, and it may be all you want to do and yet feel totally impossible. Another unfair load of bullshit from the universe. Women who’ve experienced loss are more susceptible to postpartum mood disorders and getting as much quality sleep as possible can help deter this. Poor sleep is associated with depression, independent of other risk factors (like the super shitty life altering event: loss) 

If you’re having trouble sleeping, which makes perfect sense, try:

• Calming herbs like lemon balm or skullcap. Drink these in tea form or take them in a tincture (which provides a more therapeutic dose of the herb. 
• Sleep with a weighted blanket. While, there aren’t studies to support the claim, plenty of anecdotal evidence shows that utilizing a weighted blanket can help calm the nervous system and promote more restful sleep. 
• Create a relaxing bedtime routine.  Drink a cup of tea, do restorative movement flow, meditate, take your tinctures, and sleep with white noise machine.
• Netflix & Chill. Sometimes sleep just isn’t happening. My favorite “I don’t want to be reminded of the utter shitstorm my life is right now” shows include
  • Great British Bake-off
  • Holiday Baking Championship
  • Parks & Rec (through season 5)
  • The Office (through season 5)
  • The Good Place

References

1. Kollias, H., PhD, Hart, M., & Thomas, J. (2017) et al. Pre- & Postnatal Coaching Certification Manual. Coaching and Training Women Academy.
2. https://lpi.oregonstate.edu/mic/health-disease/skin-health/vitamin-C